Cycling The Road Less Travelled

Have you ever thought of riding your bicycle from Matmata to the Sahara Desert? Well, if you did, it would go something like this:

• You and your partner are lying awake in your cave, unable to sleep because you’ve both had one to many cups of coffee. After your fill of “sleeping in a cave” jokes, you start talking about the next day’s ride and hatch a plan to go to Khar Ghilian, a beautiful oasis in the desert where many expeditions into the Sahara begin and end.

• You’re thrilled at the prospect but are a little concerned about the condition of the roads which, according to the map, are unpaved. Not having planned to be in Tunisia, you sent your knobby tires home and are cycling on skinny tires.

• Since the map is a few years old, you decide to ask around in the morning. The first person you ask tells you that “you will break the bike”. Not liking the answer, you keep asking around till someone tells you what you want to hear; it’s paved. Woohoo, you’re going to the Sahara!

• The distance between Matmata and Khar Ghilian is about 112 km, most of which is through unpopulated desert landscape.
• You start cycling.

• Hours later, you’re still cycling.
• Eventually, you get to the crossroad where you turn south to get to Khar Ghilian. Here you find the very charming Café Jelili, (one of only two stops along the route) and stop for copious amounts of tea and cookies. Write your name on their wall, as have many others who have passed here before you.

• Get back on the bikes and …cycle. You hoped for a tailwind on this section, but it’s a headwind. Damn!
• Feel like a star and wave back at all those adventure tourists in the parade of 4X4 that roll down their window and scream “Allez, allez! Bravo les courageux!!!”. And what the hell…let it go to your head just a little.
• Occasionally stop for a snack. The sun is broiling your skin and you are instantly swarmed by flies.
• It’s five and a half hours later…and yup, you’re still cycling but you only have 5 km left. YAY!
• Get a flat.
• Swear profusely.
• Eventually, after you’ve exhausted all the words in your swearing vocabulary, you change the tube.
• You get to Khar Ghilian, pushing your bike the last 2 km through very thick sand. Buy 2 cokes for 6 times the normal price to celebrate. Woohoo, you’re at the Sahara!

• Bypass the campgrounds and wild camp under a palm tree.

• Plop yourself up on a sand dune and gaze up at the stars for awhile. This is awesome.
• Next morning, wake up to the sound of four angry, wild dogs barking near your tent.
• After waiting sometime for them to leave, take a deep breath and slowly get out of your tent, hoping that they’re just “misunderstood” and really good poochies at heart.
• They get a bit closer, bark some more, and then leave….Hmm maybe there really is something to the “think happy thoughts” theory.
• Your tent is covered, as in you can barely distinguish the color of the tent, with flies. Hundreds of them.
• You pitch down the tent. The flies move unto you.
• After several fruitless attempts to swat the flies off, you give up. Thinking that they will probably be with you awhile longer you consider naming your new friends.
• Push the bikes to the coffee shops, get breakfast and water provisions, walk around a bit more, take more pictures and then start off on the 160km ride to Douz. Yup, flies still with you.

• Lo and behold, for the first time while in Tunisia, you meet two other cyclists, Raoul and Danny from Spain. Neat!

• You chat for a little bit but it’s a going to be a long day so you are all anxious to get going. Thankfully, it should be a tailwind once you get on the main road north.
• You turn onto the main road heading north and realize that the tailwind you expected is actually a fierce headwind. Dang, this is going to be brutal. Chances of getting to Douz before dark are slim.
• Its several hours later. You’re exhausted but thankfully Café Jelili is only a few km away and you’ll soon be eating cookies.

• Get another flat.
• Once again, swear profusely. This time go the extra step and make up a few swear words, just for the hell of it.
• Repair the tube.
• Get back on your bikes at get to Café Jelili. Danny and Raoul are still there.
• You have tea and cookies. Then eggs, fried tomatoes, and fries. Then more cookies.

• You talk to Danny and Raoul for hours. No one seems to be in a rush to get back on the bikes.
• The very friendly and charming owners of the café invite you to sleep there and bring out a huge meal of soup, couscous, French fries, bread, fruit, dessert. You can barely move.
• After peacefully gazing up at the stars yet again, you fall asleep. It had been a brutal day, but a great evening.
• Wake up, have even more food and get back on the bikes. At this point, you are turning the corner. You’re sure to have a tailwind.
• Wrong! It’s a headwind once again and in about 30 minutes it turns into brutal sandstorm. Worst conditions you have EVER cycled in.
• Cycle into the storm at an average pace of 10km/hour, trying hard to actually stay on the road.
• Tunisians are very friendly and hospitable so you’re not surprised when a truck stops to give you a ride. You’re about to load the bikes onto the truck but, for some unknown, inexplicable reason, you just can’t bring yourself to do it quite yet. Hmmm…well perhaps it has something to do with a broken collar bone. Anyway, this is “personal”.
• You continue to struggle all day, the winds never let up. On the upside, you get to cycle through Chott El Djérid, Tunisia’s largest salt pan. Pretty neat.

• 5 hours later you make it to Douz, exhausted and encrusted with sand.
• First water, then food, then shower, then sleep.