Feb 14th, 2009

Exhibiting Odd Behaviour

by Maria
Posted in Cambodia

Being so close to the end of our trip, we are inevitably thinking about what it will be like to be back home. The more we think about it, the more we are convinced that we will be exhibiting some very odd behaviour, at least for a little while. Here are some examples, along with the explanations and what you should do.

Behaviour: You see us walking down Robson street, waving randomly at complete strangers and screaming out: “Hello”, “Saybaidee”, “Jambo”, “My name is Maria” and “We’re going to Blenz”.

Explanation: Every day we cycled in Africa or Asia, several times a day, we would be greeted by people on the side of the road. Almost every greeting would be followed by the questions “What is your name?” and “Where are you go?”.

What to do: Gently remind us that we are not royalty; no one cares who we are or where we go.

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Behaviour: You see us devouring huge portions of food at an alarming rate.

Explanation: We just spent over a year cycling. The question wasn’t “should we have a treat today?” but “how many treats should we have today?”. You really do loose all sense of what a “normal” amount of food is.

What to do: Unfortunately, there is really nothing you can do here. You needn’t feel the need to point out the double chin or the extra folds. Eventually, we’ll come to grips with the fact that we are no longer burning 3000 calories a day and we’ll …(gasp, horror of all horrors)…put the 18th pastry of the day down. This is just going to have to run its course.

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Behaviour: We show up at a party in an old sweat-stained t-shirt and bike shorts.

Explanation: Part habit, part cost.

What to do: Well, we’re cheap and we hate shopping so you’ll have no other choice but to shame us into changing this most unfortunate behaviour. Gently remind us that over a year’s worth of photos of us in spandex is: “more then enough, thank you”.

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Behaviour: During a company meeting (yes, we do assume we will find work again), you catch us not paying attention.

Explanation: We’re probably daydreaming about elephants, giraffes, sand dunes, deserts and Pyramids.

What to do: Nothing you can do (if it makes you feel better, we probably weren’t paying that much attention before we left on our trip either). Hmmmm…does anyone else think I am subconsciously ruining any possibility of ever finding employment again?

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Behaviour: Talking incessantly about our trip.

Explanation: This has been one of the most amazing adventures of our lives.

What to do: Tough one. You may feel the need to humour us but this is dangerous territory. I’m pretty sure we’ll continue talking well after your eyes start to glaze over. It is probably best to make a quick getaway. (P.S. Consider this my one and only warning ;-) ).

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Behaviour: You invite us over for dinner. When we say goodbye, you notice a huge bulge in Spiros’ pocket.

Explanation: First of all, get your mind out of the gutter. This isn’t going where you think it is. We’ve simply stolen your toilet paper.

What to do: This could be embarrassing for us all so we’ll leave ‘what to do’ up to you. Just to let you know though, you probably won’t get the toilet paper back.

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